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Author's Notes: I was not eating chocolate when I wrote this. In fact, I don't know where it came from. But it was fun to write, which means it will probably be one of my favorites for a while. And it's probably somehow all SullivanLane's fault. I'm guessing cosmic twin vibes or something.

Chocolate Covered Compliments of the Chef
by Maveness Delight

Somebody remind me again not to jump the pretty boy.

But he's got chocolate on him!

No, leave the pretty boy alone. He'll notice the chocolate. He'll wipe it off. Just keep your hands/tongue/teeth/lips to yourself.

And God! It's a bad sign when your lust-addled brain actually argues with itself over the moral implications of mauling innocent farmboys.

Wait. Not so innocent farmboys. Who are licking their fingers in a most seductive and delicious manner.

Damn him!

Okay, there was an origination point for this whole insane argument. I've been back from Metropolis for...2 days, 3 hours and 27 minutes. During which time Clark has barely left my side. We've been like Velcro. Which is interesting since Velcro has a male and a female. Clark's reasoning, not mine. I won't explain. Especially considering I don't understand either.

And apparently over the summer he acquired a taste for Hershey's kisses. An obsessive love. I'm almost tempted to buy him a fanny pack and fill it to the brim so he's never without.

Fanny. Clark. Damn!

Okay, so. He's taken to eating Hershey's kisses at all hours of the day. He actually made me drive 3 miles out of my way just because a certain store has the freshest Hershey's kisses. I don't want to know how he knows that. His weirdness is becoming legendary.

Now here we are, sitting in the barn loft, little silver wrappers littering the floor around us.

"You know, I could almost wallpaper this place with all of these wrappers."

Oh God, he's gone all the way to delusional. Kisses tinfoil wallpaper? Why does crazy have to be so sexy?

"Well don't wait for me to help. I have better things to do with my time," I said, popping a kiss in my mouth. What? The darn things are good!

"Hey! Those are mine!"

"Baby," I mutter around a mouthful of chocolate.

"Ohh, keep talking sweet to me Chloe."

Clark just taunted me. Me! The queen of snark. With chocolate on the corner of his lip and a gleam in his eye.

Okay, I give up. Resistance is futile.

"The only way I'll sweet talk you is if you give me sweets first."

Aw, now he's got that cute, clueless little boy look on his face. Yeah doofus. I flirted. I don't think he expected that response.

And a raised eyebrow. He's accepting the challenge! Ladies and gentlemen let the games begin.

"Now why should I willingly give you my chocolate before I hear what you have to say. You could say something mean. How about I reward you for each one with the appropriate number of kisses."

He did not just say that. I could go so many places. But I won't. Nope. Gonna stay in the realm of sane. He's just taunting me. Throwing out the innuendo to mess with my head. But it won't work. I'm smarter than him, sharper. In this game of Hershey's Survivor I will outwit, outplay, outlast.

"That's not fair. You could be unfair and judge my sweet talk harshly and I wouldn't get any kisses. And I really, really want kisses."

I can't giggle. I can't. But by God, I think I killed him. He's choking and sputtering and turning an interesting shade of red. Maybe I shouldn't have laid it on so thick with the pouty lip and the Rita Hayworth vamp bit. Wait. What am I saying? Of course I should be using the big guns. The boy has to go down.

Yes, bad me.

And there's a twinkle in his eye that says he won't back down. I have taught my boy well. Nice to know he doesn't give in easily.

"Don't worry Chloe. You'll get plenty of kisses. Just make sure to lay it on real thick. I want to feel flattered."

Oh my God. He didn't just. I wonder how many kisses it would take to choke someone if you rammed them down their throat. Wait. I can't do that. I can't let my anger get the best of me. That's how he's trying to win.

I can outfox him though. He's trying to anger me into making a rash move, like saying I don't want to play anymore. So I'll use the weapons in my arsenal. Time to introduce Clark to Va-Va and Voom.

So lean forward, flip the hair and nonchalantly pull the top down just a little to make the cleavage pop. Now pouty lips, bedroom eyes and time to throw out a compliment to melt his chocolate.

"I can't imagine how a big, strong, sexy man like you manages to stay single. Why, those eyes of yours alone are enough to drive women wild with want. You truly are quite stunning."

Score! Chloe: 1. Clark: 0.

"Not bad. That was worth two kisses."


"Not bad? Only two? Come on!" This boy is full of it. That was a first rate come on, a definite high ranker in the compliment department.

I catch the two he tosses to me.

"I know you Chloe. That was not living up to your potential. Give me something specific. Something truly inspired. Not cliche-riddled romance novelized drivel. Start with the eyes thing."

Clark. Smug. Grrrrr. Revenge will be so sweet.

"You have eyes like two moons. Deep, mesmerizing, bright and full. They beckon people to your light. Draw the masses in. Tempt all who gaze upon them with their brilliance."

Flying chocolate. One this time?!? Is he insane?

"Nice try, but that was too impersonal. Give me something deeper, something that's plausible. I am never going to tempt masses with my eyes."

So he thinks. Okay. Gotta convince the clueless boy that he's overwhelming to the senses.

"You have a beautiful, pure soul that is so full of love that you can't help but inspire those around you to greater goodness. You are kind and wonderful and absolutely stunning. The rest of us can only aspire to your goodness."

Got him with that one. He's blinking at me and looking mildly stunned. Hmmm. I may win this fairly quickly. Can't wait to see how much chocolate I'll get. As soon as he regains the ability to speak.


That's it? This boy is hard to please. I would have given that one a five. Okay, so what will work to make him cave?

"Your hands have a strength in them that speaks volumes of who you are. Gentle and soft when cradling a hurt friend, strong and hard when dealing with those who would dare lay a hand on someone weaker. Your hands best display your protective nature. The true symbol of your Savior soul."

He sits there for a minute, probably pondering the worth of what I said. And now he's holding out my prize for me to take. I scoot over to get...two.

"What does a girl have to do to get more than three lousy kisses?"

Darn it. My exasperation got the best of me. But I'm not giving up.

"Get personal."

And he just said that with a very husky voice. Like he might actually know what this game is about. Wait. What is this game about? I'm starting to get very confused here.

"Um, okay. You have a smile that lights up a room. Wait!" He looks like he's about to interrupt me. "Let me finish. You have a smile that lights up a room because of the joy that it conveys. Every person in your radius can't help but feel better just by seeing your lavish displays of happiness. Your smile is...captivating. An awe-inspiring sight. No one person should ever be that happy, and yet in that one moment, that space in time when you are smiling, you are, and so is everyone else around you. Your smile lightens my soul."

Now that was a winner. I can tell by the way his eyes have gone all heavy and the way he's leaning toward me slightly. He's also looking fairly dazed. Like he got hit with a truck. Methinks the boy really has no clue what a catch he is. Heh. I guess he's the King of Oblivious to my Queen of Snark.

And he's not handing me kisses. He's unwrapping them.

"Hey! That was definitely not a no kiss compliment. That deserves something."

A "be patient" look. So he's got something up his sleeve. Like I care. I just want the kisses. I'm talking about the chocolate here. I swear.

And he's holding out an unwrapped kiss. I'm half an arm's length away, so he doesn't have far to reach, but for some reason he won't hand it over.

"Open your mouth."

Oh God. He's going to feed me. My brain is shutting down.

Chocolate. Clark's fingers. Melty, warm chocolate on Clark skin. Damn it. I just whimpered.

I open my eyes and there's another chocolate kiss, beckoning me from his fingertips. Wait. When did I close my eyes?

Mouth full of Clark and kiss again. This could get so addicting. No, it is so addicting. I can't help but love the mixture of sweet chocolate and slightly salty, so flavorful Clark skin.

And withdrawal. Damn. I whimpered again. I have got to stop that. It's entirely too wanton.

Two kisses in quick succession. Well, at least I made it to four this time. With a tasty addition. Although I doubt that Clark would find it to be rewarding to have a mouthful of his skin.

"One more."


"Compliment or kiss?"


Could his voice be any huskier? Guess I'm not the only one getting all hot and bothered. I guess there are advantages all around to this little game. Looks like farmboy may make a move yet.

"You're you Clark. Who could ask for anything better."

Only one kiss as a reward. But I don't mind. This kiss is much better than chocolate.

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