Title:  The Reason Why
Author:  Wravyn
<fudgy_sundae@hotmail.com>

Disclaimer:  The characters portrayed in this story are the rightful creations Ė deemed so by the copyrights they carry Ė of Joss Whedon and  Mutant Enemy.  Their use in this piece is not for the purpose of gaining  money or fame, but merely because I want to exploit their characters for my  own twisted purposes.

Whew!  What a mouthful! ;0)

Distrubution:  The Queen Cordy site and the Scribes, of course.  Anyone  else, just ask.

Authorís Note:  This is a total switch from Still Awake.  Just some Cordy  angst I dredged up when I was feeling all blah about things in general.  No  plot or action, just some thoughts.  Bo-ring . . .

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Perfection

They all think Iím perfect.

No . . . thatís not right.  They all think I think Iím perfect.  Other  people can so easily see my flaws.  Selfishness, vanity, outright rudeness  and a disdainful disregard for others not privileged enough to be me.   Common vices in the general population.  Mankind was not made to be perfect  and I am only a woman, after all.  What keeps me separate from their lowly
selves, though, is the fact that Iím just . . . better than they are.   Popularity is a redeeming value.  No more so than either wealth or beauty  is.  And of those qualities Iíve got plenty to share.  But would I share?   Do I even care that others donít have my ďperfectionĒ, my lot in life?  Of  course I care!  How else could I sort through the duds and find the lucky  few who I deem worthy of my attention and companionship?  Popularity,  wealth, and beauty.  You gotta have it if you wanna hang with the star.  But only to a certain extent, of course.  Canít have anyone trying to rival me  now, can I?  Though, of course, no one can.  And sometimes itís good to have  a simple little plain Jane (or John, as the case may be) adoring me Ė from  afar of course Ė because itís good for my image.

Ha. Classic behavior from the one they call the ďQueenĒ.

Do they think I donít know what I do, what I say, that makes me such a  heartless bitch?  I know how it hurts them, thatís why I do it.  It does  seem cruel, doesnít it?  But life in the spotlight has taught me one thing .  . . there are no real friends up at the top.  I donít do it for the sake of  being mean, you understand, I do it because I have to.  Really.  Iíve had my  share of harsh experiences.  Itís best to keep cool and impersonal when  youíre in a situation like mine.  That means never get too close to a person  and attack them before they have a chance to attack you and inevitably  hurting you.

I made that mistake once.  I will not make it again.

Twisted logic or no twisted logic, itís worked for me in the past, so Iím  keeping it.  Theyíre all out to get you, so watch your back.  And if you  trample on a few broken hearts and bruised egos on the way, well, thatís  purely a coincidence.

Perfection is merely a state of mind.  And like all those yoga, feng shui  gurus or whatever say, visualization is the key to achieving your goal.   Very few people are born perfect.  I know I wasnít.

FIN