Penny For Your Thoughts
By: Katherina Rosellini
Date: August 2001
Synopsis: A short piece about what goes on through the heads of new lovers. Set immediately after the episode "Revulsion".
Paramount owns 'em. I wish I did.
Penny For Your Thoughts
"Are you sure your heart can take it?" she kept hearing those words over and over again in her head seeing those beautiful blue eyes looking at her with such emotion. She thought to herself, my heart has been waiting for this for a long time, and began preparing for the evening ahead.
Tom Paris sat at the helm, if you could call his squirming sitting, waiting for his shift to end. So many images going through his mind. Memories of the past few days. He and B'Elanna floating in space. Their conversation while waiting for Voyager to find them.
She actually likes the man that you've tried to become, hell...she loves you. She loves you, and you love her too. God, you're in love with her, Paris. You're in love with the most beautiful woman in the universe, and she loves you back. Now all you have to do is tell her. It's easy just say "I love you B'Elanna". Piece of cak....
"What did you say, Lieutenant?"
Turning quickly around in his chair he looked at the Captain and asked, "I'm sorry, ma'am?"
"I asked you what you were mumbling to yourself over there? Anything interesting that you would like to share with the rest of us?" Captain Kathryn Janeway asked as she made a small gesture with her hand towards the rest of the bridge crew reminding him that he was still on duty.
"No ma'am. I was just...thinking out loud. It won't happen again."
With a knowing grin and a quick glance towards Chakotay she said, "See that it doesn't."
Tom turned back to the helm, and told himself to be more careful next time. The last thing you want to do, Tommy boy, is tell everyone on the bridge that you love B'Elanna before you tell B'Elanna.
B'Elanna.... and his thoughts started flowing once again towards the half Klingon, half human, all woman that stole his heart.
B'Elanna Torres was lounging in the sitting area of her quarters waiting for Tom to arrive. It shouldn't be much longer. I wonder if I should change. Maybe this dress is too much. Well if the dress is too much, B’Elanna, then the candles and the wine are really going overboard. What if I left the candles, but changed back into my uniform, or I could leave on the dress, but put the candles away, and.....
"That's it Torres. You're driving yourself crazy. He'll be here soon enough, and then you'll know for sure if he loves you too.” She said to herself as she laid her head back and closed her eyes.
Of course he loves you too. He wouldn't have kissed you that way earlier if he didn't. Right? Or would he? I mean up until recently you still thought of him as a womanizer. Well maybe not a womanizer, but definitely a pig. Ah! But he's your pig now B’Elanna. Or is he? He has to be. I don't know what I would do if he didn't feel the same way about me as I feel about him. Yes, but you did tell him that you didn't expect him to reciprocate. As a matter of fact you told him to forget you told him you loved him. Huh?
"B'Elanna, I definitely think that you've crossed the line from going crazy to just losing your mind. He loves you too and you know it."
Or do I? Please, Tom, love me too.
"Computer, locate Lt. Torres."
"Lt. Torres is in her quarters."
"Well then why isn't she answering her door?"
"Please rephrase the question."
He remembered the events of the day: B'Elanna getting injured on the away mission and having to go through surgery to repair the damage caused to her heart. What if she’s had some sort of complications due to surgery, or maybe the Doctor forgot to repair one of her arteries? She could be bleeding to death internally.
"Computer, open this door. Emergency medical code authorization Paris Alpha One," he watched as the doors to her quarter’s swished open.
Well at least this nurse thing has its privileges.
Tom surveyed the room quickly looking for B'Elanna, and when he found her his heart skipped a beat. Kneeling down next to her sleeping form he placed a light kiss on her forehead, and looked at her. So beautiful, he thought, and kissed her again, this time on the lips, just as her eyes began to flutter open.
"Tom." she said groggily. I could get used to waking up this way.
"Hey." he said while running a finger down her cheek. I could watch her sleep for hours.
"Hey yourself. What time is it?"
"Time for you to go to bed, and get some rest. Come on I'll tuck you in." he said as he stood by her side and held out his hand to her.
She placed her hand in his tugging him down towards her. "Come here. I've been waiting for this all day."
"But B'Elanna, you're tired. You should really get some rest."
"I'm tired, Tom, not dead." Thank God!
Thank God! With that he let her pull him onto her. Lying on top of her small form he asked, "Am I too heavy for you?"
"No, Tom. You feel...perfect."
They looked deeply into each other's eyes and touched the other's face as in disbelief.
Is she really here with me? Lying underneath me? This can't be happening. You don't deserve someone as beautiful as this, Tom.
Is this really him touching my face and looking at me as though I'm beautiful and with such love? Love. He hasn't said it yet, B'Elanna.
God, how I love her. Then tell her, Paris.
"B'Elanna?" He gulped.
"Yes." Her breath, held.
There was a long pause as though he were looking for the right words to say.
Just say it!
Please God let him say it.
"Are you sure I'm not hurting you?" Chicken!
Damn! "No. You're not hurting me."
Not if you don't count the fact that I've told you twice now that I loved you and you haven't said it yet. So tell him again, B’Elanna. Maybe he needs to hear it again. This is Tom Paris we're talking about here. I mean think about it. You've told him when you were on the brink of death, and admitted to it when he had you cornered in the hallway immediately following a champagne toast. Not exactly the ideal situations to pledge your love to someone.
As he leaned in to kiss her she touched his face gently on the chin and said, "I love you, Tom."
Don't be afraid, you can do this. You love her so just tell her. Mustering up every ounce of emotion he had, he said "Me too, B'Elanna." and he kissed her.
He loves me! Tom Paris loves me. Thank you, God.
See, Tom. Piece of cake.