Disclaimer: All Star Trek characters belong to Paramount. CHOICES by Timina@aol.com Background: After six years in the Delta Quadrant, USS Voyager found a wormhole that they determined to be safe and was able to return to the Alpha Quadrant. Although B'Elanna Torres and Chakotay were still officially members of the Voyager crew, they had serious discussions about what their future would be and the possibility of rejoining the Maquis group and continuing the fight against the Cardassians. Kathryn knew of Chakotay's discussions and felt a deep sadness in her heart for she had grown to love her first officer but knew that Chakotay's dedication to his cause would preclude their having any future together. She knew in her heart that she would never leave Starfleet. B'Elanna and Tom had also grown quite close during the last few years of their mission but their return to Earth caused them to think about quite a few issues: like what their future would be like if they stayed together, should they go back to Starfleet.... In the end, B'Elanna felt she belonged more with the Maquis. Tom, not wanting to be separated from her, has decided that he would leave Starfleet and join her. His decision was all the more suprising for he had received an official pardon from Starfleet Command in view of his long service on Voyager and the glowing words of recommendation from Captain Kathryn Janeway. Tom was initially torn between re-joining Starfleet and being an officer again but in the end his heart made his decision for him. He loved B'Elanna too much. His decision shocked Janeway and Torres. Janeway had such high hopes for Paris after learning of the official pardon but eventually understood the reason behind it. Torres on the other hand was more shocked that Paris would make such a big sacrifice for her. That was why she enlisted Harry's help to convince Tom to stay with Starfleet. They were still on Voyager orbiting Earth. "Harry, you have to help me! You have to convince Tom to stay with Starfleet. Tell him anything. Tell him we're running away together," B'Elanna clutched desperately at Harry's sleeve. Harry glanced up at his friend's face. He knew what B'Elanna was feeling. After Tom had found out that B'Elanna was going back with Chakotay and the Maquis group, he decided to resign his Starfleet commission. "It's not going to work B'Elanna. Tom's made up his mind about this. And," he smiled crookedly at B'Elanna, "that stuff about us running away together won't wash with Tom. He knows us too well," Harry sighed resignedly. "It can work Harry. I'll tell Tom that I've realized I love you and will go back to Earth with you on the next transport." "B'Elanna! I can't do that to Tom. He's my best friend. Think how betrayed he'll feel." "At least he won't be sacrificing his life. He's already been captured once by the Federation and this pardon from his prison sentence really meant a lot to him. And to his father too although he won't admit that. If he joins the Maquis, he'll go to jail again if he's captured." B'Elanna combed trembling fingers through her tousled hair. "I don't think I can face that. I love him too much." The words tumbled out unconsciously from B'Elanna's lips. Shocked at the words she just uttered, she looked at Harry. "Please Harry, help me! You'll be helping him too!" Harry pondered her words. He knew she was right. He felt the same way that B'Elanna did: that Tom was going to throw everything if he joined the Maquis. But he had to weigh his friendship for Tom too. Did he have the right to interfere with Tom's decision? And if he and B'Elanna went through with this charade, he would lose Tom's friendship forever. He felt a huge weight on his shoulders. "I'll talk to Tom," Harry suggested. "I'll try but I'm not promising anything." But now knowing B'Elanna's feelings about Tom, he looked closely into her eyes. "Maybe it would be better if Tom joins you guys. At least you'll be together." B'Elanna lightly punched Harry on the shoulder. "Harry, he's Starfleet. I'm Maquis. It'll never work out in the long run." Harry winced kiddingly, pretending to be hurt and rubbing his shoulder. "But think about the time you two will have being together. Life is too short B'Elanna. Why not give him the chance and spend it with each other?" "Don't talk me out of it Starfleet." B'Elanna didn't tell Harry that she was sorely tempted to tell Tom to join her. She wanted it more than anything but what if he regretted joining the Maquis someday? She knew Tom well enough that he would never say it but she would somehow feel it. Harry turned towards the door to leave and as the doors swished open, he found Tom standing outside with his right hand on the door buzzer and his left hand clutching one long stemmed red rose. "Tom!" "Harry!" Tom was equally surprised. "What are you doing here?" There must have been some kind of guilty look on Harry's face for Tom's blue eyes narrowed suspiciously. "What are you two up to?" His gaze flashed to B'Elanna who had a little trouble meeting his eyes. *What's going on with this two?* he wondered jealously. He saw Harry look at B'Elanna and give a little shrug and Tom's eyes fell on B'Elanna's unmade bed, his mind leaping to the totally wrong conclusions. Harry and B'Elanna both followed where Tom's eyes were looking. Harry knew at this point that whatever he said would come out wrong so he decided to retreat instead. "I gotta go," Harry fled towards his own quarters, leaving B'Elanna to face Tom. Tom stared at his friend's receding back, his mind in a whirl. "Hi Tom," B'Elanna reached up, kissed him on the cheek and led him inside. The doorbell chimed to Tom's quarters. "Come in!", he called out, continuing to empty his closet and stuffing it into his suitcase. His face turned serious when he saw that it was Harry. "Oh hello," his voice was cool. He still hadn't figured out what Harry was doing in B'Elanna's room and she had steadfastly refused to tell him, commenting only that nothing happened between her and Harry. She had merely forgotten to clean up that morning. They almost got into a fight until Tom decided drop the matter with B'Elanna but to confront Harry instead. When he returned to his own quarters a few hours later, his jealous mind was already conjuring up secret trysts between Harry and B'Elanna. *Oh Tom, don't be ridiculous*, he finally scolded himself. *Harry's your best friend, for goodness sake. They wouldn't do anything to hurt me*, he reassured himself. "I know what you're going to say Harry. Don't even persuade me to do otherwise. My mind's made up. I love B'Elanna and I'm willing to risk everything to be with her." Harry looked at Tom. "Even if it's means the possibility of going to prison again?" Tom laughed mirthlessly. "I've been to prison Harry. I can take it." "What if B'Elanna doesn't share your feelings?" "I know how B'Elanna feels. She hasn't said it to me yet but I know she loves me too." Tom said that most decidedly. Harry almost smiled at that for he knew Tom was on the mark. There was no stopping Tom when he made a decision. He smiled a little guiltily at Tom. "What?" Tom asked inquisitively, stopping his packing long enough to look at Harry. He had caught that guilty little smile and was besieged again by thoughts of his two friends being together. "B'Elanna and I wanted to stop you from leaving Starfleet and....," Harry laughed a little self-consciously. Tom flipped over the lid of his suitcase and snapped it shut. "And...?" "We were going to cook up this little scheme that B'Elanna and I were in love all along and she was returning to Earth with me. That way, you'd thought she was no longer with the Maquis and you'll stay with Starfleet. That's why I was in her quarters. We were talking about you." Tom suddenly smiled warmly at Harry and was glad that he had such good friends who were really concerned about his welfare. "It's my decision but I do appreciate you guys looking out for me." He playfully punched Harry on the shoulder. "And your little scheme wouldn't have worked anyway." Tom laughed at the idea. Harry stood up and hugged Tom briefly. "You're my best friend. I'll miss you." He groaned as he suddenly realized something. "Oh God, I hope B'Elanna doesn't hurt me." A few days later... "Harry! Harry! Wake up!" Harry stirred sleepily, half-wondering who was shaking him. What little light there was in his room illuminated the tense face of Tom Paris. Immediately, all sleepiness fell away from Harry. "What is it?" Tom started pacing the room. "B'Elanna's gone." Harry had gone to the bathroom and splashed some water on his face. When he heard Tom's announcement, he started in surprise and accidentally spilled water on his chest. "What? When did you find out?" Tom sat down on the sofa and buried his head in his hands. "This morning when I went to her quarters. I've got to find her Harry." Harry sat down beside him. "Does Captain Janeway know she's gone?" "Chakotay doesn't even know. He's even more surprised that she's gone." Tom looked at Harry and Harry was worried at the empty look in his friend's blue eyes and there were circles under his eyes. "We'll find her Tom. Don't worry. We'll ask the Captain for help." "Doctor to Lt. Paris." Tom's combadge chirped and the Doctor's voice filled Harry's room. Tom slapped at his combadge. "Paris here." "Lt. Paris, do you know where Lt. Torres is? She was scheduled for a checkup at 0800 hours but she has not shown up." "She's gone Doctor. Nobody knows where she is." Tom looked dejectedly at Harry. "It's imperative we find her." Tom noted the urgency in the Doctor's voice and immediately got concerned. "What is it Doctor?" he demanded. "There might be complications...." the Doctor's voice trailed off. "I'd rather not discuss it over the comm system if you don't mind. Please come down to Sickbay." Tom looked at Harry as the Doctor signed off. There was a scared look on Tom's face. "What is it?" Harry asked, a niggling fear beginning to build in his heart for his missing friend. "Will you come down to Sickbay with me?" Harry nodded, understanding his friend's need for moral support. "Let me throw on some clothes," Harry said and as he turned to go to his closet, his combadge chirped. "Chakotay to Kim." *Oh no. I forgot I was supposed to be on duty 5 minutes ago.* "Kim here sir. Sorry I'm late sir. I'll be right there." He nodded apologetically at Tom. "Is there a problem Mr. Kim?" Chakotay queried. Harry looked at Tom, wondering how much detail he could get into, not wanting to invade Tom's private life. But Tom nodded at him to go on. "Sir, the Doctor summoned Lt. Paris to Sickbay regarding Lt.Torres and I was going to accompany him." Silence on the other side. "Very well Mr. Kim. But be ready for duty in an hour. Chakotay out." "C'mon Tom, let's go." Tom and Harry charged into Sickbay like the hounds of hell were at their feet. They found the Doctor hunched over his medical padd in his office. He looked up as the two officers entered. "Mr. Paris, I don't know if you're aware of this or not, or that even if Lt. Torres told you, but she's pregnant." the Doctor's voice was flat, devoid of any inflections. But the news was a bombshell to Tom. "Pregnant!" He sat down abruptly on the couch. Kim was also dumbfounded. He hadn't realized how really involved Tom and B'Elanna were. "Judging from your reaction, it's safe to assume you did not know. Nevertheless, I've been checking her earlier scans and found some anomalies. It could be nothing or it could be serious. That's why it's imperative you find her." Tom and Harry reported for duty on the bridge right after they visited the doctor. Harry assumed his usual post at the Operations Station while Tom sat down behind the helm. Before he sat down, he caught Chakotay's eye. Chakotay nodded at him in understanding. He too was worried about B'Elanna. Tom mechanically did his duties. His fingers moving automatically to the buttons that would keep Voyager in orbit. In the meantime his mind was on B'Elanna. *Where are you B'Elanna? Come back to the ship. Come back to me!* His mind was so occupied with worry that he barely heard Janeway telling him something. His face flushed at his inattentiveness as he faced his captain. "Sorry, Captain." "Mr. Paris, my ready room please." Janeway stood up and strode towards her office. Tom steeled himself for a reprimand at his inattentiveness as the doors closed behind him in Janeway's ready room. The unexpected kindness in Janeway's voice surprised him. "Tom, about B'Elanna. She apparently got in touch with some Maquis sympathizers while on Earth and they picked her up yesterday. We've alerted Starfleet." Janeway felt compassion for her pilot as he looked at her, his eyes betraying his worry for their Chief Engineer. "I've also informed them of B'Elanna's condition and needless to say it has become a priority." Janeway's badge beeped. "Janeway here." Tuvok's calm voice came through. "Captain, we have located Lt. Torres." Paris was almost out the door before he remembered that Janeway hadn't dismissed him. He waited for Janeway to nod at him and they entered the bridge. "Report," Janeway ordered as she assumed her position. "Her shuttle developed engine trouble and had to dock in the repair station in Mars," Tuvok reported calmly. "We have been cleared to leave orbit." "Coordinates laid in Captain," Tom confirmed, his fingers fairly itching to punch the engage button. "Engage Mr. Paris." Janeway was grateful that Mars wasn't far away. She had been talking to the Doctor and was also worried about B'Elanna's condition. Janeway, Paris and Tuvok beamed down to the Starfleet repair station. "Captain!" they were greeted by a burly fellow. Janeway smiled. "Hello Destin. How've you been?" "Never felt better," Destin boomed, clearly happy to see Janeway. Not wanting to interrupt but clearly anxious, Tom ventured a little timidly, "Captain...?" Janeway understood. "Destin, a shuttle came in here from Earth for emergency repairs with one of my crewmembers. Do you know where they took her?" "What's her name?" Destin walked over to a console and punched up the repair log. "B'Elanna Torres." "Aye, I remember her. She almost fainted when they docked. Luckily one of her crewmates caught her. They took her to sickbay." Destin clucked sympathetically. "Excuse us Destin. We need to check on my Chief Engineer," Janeway excused herself and her crew as they headed straight to sickbay. Tom's head swiveled around the sickbay as soon as they entered the room. It was a small clinic and it wasn't hard to spot B'Elanna. Tom was immediately at her side. He glanced down at her pale face and stroked her forehead gently. Janeway and Tuvok remained at a short distance to give them a few moments together. As if responding to his presence, B'Elanna's lovely black eyes opened and for a moment revealed her joy that Tom was beside her. "Hey there," Tom said in the softest and gentlest voice B'Elanna knew was reserved just for her. "Hey Tom," she responded weakly. "You gave us quite a scare. Why did you leave B'Elanna?" Tom clasped her hand tightly in his own. "Yes, B'Elanna, why did you leave?" Janeway finally joined in, concern for her Chief Engineer written all over her face. B'Elanna glanced first at Tom then at Janeway as if unsure how to answer. Looking down at Paris' hand, B'Elanna seemed to gather the courage to say what was on her mind. She looked up again bravely to meet inquiring eyes. "I love him," she said simply and her eyes shone when she looked at Tom. "I couldn't let him throw away his life for me. He has a much brighter future now that I could never share..." her voice broke as unshed tears brightened her eyes. Janeway nodded to Paris and joined Tuvok outside Sickbay to give her two officers more privacy. Paris was grateful to share this private moment with the woman he loved. Grasping her hand with both of his he said, "B'Elanna, what kind of future would it be for me if you're not there with me? I love you," he poured out. "And our unborn baby." B'Elanna was shocked. "How did you know? I didn't tell anyone except the doctor." "He only told me because he was worried about your condition and when you didn't show up for your check-up, he asked me where you were and that was after we found out you were gone," Paris explained. "Excuse me," a voice chimed in the background. Tom and B'Elanna looked at the newcomer. "Hi Doctor," B'Elanna greeted him. Doctor Benjamin walked inside and smiled at his patient and at Tom. "Hello," he held out his hand to Tom. "I'm Doctor Benjamin. I was on duty when Lt. Torres was brought in." Tom shook his hand. "Lt. Tom Paris from USS Voyager. Doctor, is something the matter with B'Elanna?" The doctor nodded approvingly at Tom's directness regarding the health of his patient. *He must care for her very much*, he thought. He consulted his charts for a few minutes. "Your doctor on Voyager hailed me almost immediately when your ship came into range, demanding to know about Lt. Torres' condition. For a hologram, he sure cares a lot for his patients." There was a note of admiration in his voice. "Anyway, Lt. Torres lost consciousness when they got here and I had her take some tests. Now not to worry," he added as he saw Tom's brow furrow with concern, "it's not as serious as your doctor thought it would be. She'll be fine." Tom suddenly hugged B'Elanna as a wave of relief swept over him. His B'Elanna was going to be okay and she was in his arms right now. He felt that nothing could go wrong. "But," the doctor cleared his throat to get their attentions and waited until both B'Elanna and Tom gave him their undivided attention. "But..." Tom and B'Elanna both asked worriedly, as they waited with bated breath. "You'll have to avoid stress for the rest of your pregnancy." Doctor Benjamin looked pointedly at B'Elanna. "No running around trying to fix engines." B'Elanna guessed that the doctor knew about her connection to the Maquis and was trying to be subtle about it. "B'Elanna?" was all Tom could ask, the unspoken question reflected in his eyes. "Excuse me," Janeway interrupted as she entered the clinic again. "Tom, Tuvok and I will return to the ship. You can stay here with B'Elanna and escort her back to the ship when the doctor decides to release her." "Aye, Captain." "I'm sorry but you'll have to go too," Dr. Benjamin told Tom, "she has to get some rest." Tom looked at B'Elanna. "I'll be back soon," and he leaned over and kissed her tenderly on the forehead. As he bent over her, he whispered quietly, "I love you." B'Elanna closed her eyes as emotions swept over her. "I love you too Tom," she whispered back. Her eyes were shining when Tom took one last look at her and left with Janeway and Tuvok. One week after, B'Elanna is released from the Mars clinic, Janeway calls B'Elanna to her ready room. "Well B'Elanna, it's your choice. Starfleet has offered not to press any charges against any Maquis members who served onboard Voyager." Janeway gestured to B'Elanna to sit down. "Really Captain?" B'Elanna didn't know whether to be happy at that bit of information. "Yes, they even offered to reinstate Chakotay to his Starfleet rank. And you know Tom was granted full pardon from his prison sentence. They're still reviewing whether to give him back his officer standing." "That's great!" B'Elanna was happy for Tom. "And that leaves you," Janeway stood up and sat beside B'Elanna. "Look, B'Elanna, if you want to talk, not as officers, but woman-to-woman, I'm willing to listen." B'Elanna looked at Janeway and nodded. "I love Tom. I don't know what I'd do without him. We didn't mean for this to happen. Getting pregnant I mean. But now I know I have his baby growing inside me, it seems like nothing else is important but the baby and being with Tom." She paused. "I was going to rejoin the Maquis with Chakotay, you know." Janeway nodded. "Chakotay told me as much. He also told me he tried to discourage you from joining the Maquis when we came back to Earth." "He tried but...." "But?" "I figured Tom would go back to Starfleet once he was pardoned and I don't have anything to go back to except the Maquis. And it would look bad for Tom if he got involved with a member of the Maquis so I thought we would break up once we reached Earth. I didn't think Tom would give up Starfleet for me." "He loves you B'Elanna. I don't think he'll be happy with Starfleet if you two are separated." "But with the baby, it changes everything. I can't risk the baby." B'Elanna looked at Janeway and seemed to come to a decision. Janeway saw the look in B'Elanna's eyes and understood. They both stood up and hugged each other. Janeway tapped her commbadge. "Janeway to Paris. Please report to my ready room." On the bridge, Chakotay nodded to Paris who motioned to a crewmember to take over the helm. Paris quickly stood up and strode to the Captain's Ready Room. The doors swished open as the ringer chimed and Janeway said "Enter". "You wanted to see me Captain?" "Yes Mr. Paris. Lt. Torres here has something to tell you. I'll be on the bridge." Janeway exited. B'Elanna looked shyly up at Tom and unconsciously patted her belly. "Hey there!" she greeted Tom, who smiled at her. Tom sat beside her and enveloped her in his arms. They remained like that for a couple of minutes, savoring their closeness. After awhile, B'Elanna pulled back. "I've made a decision." Tom felt his heart beating rapidly. He wanted to ask B'Elanna something but it all depended on whether she decided to stay or not. "Well, aren't you going to ask me what it is?" she asked coyly up at him. He smiled nervously. "Okay, what have you decided?" "I won't join the Maquis anymore. You and the baby mean too much to me." B'Elanna stated her decision simply. Any doubts she might have had disappeared and she knew she had made the right decision. The look on Tom's face was priceless. Expressions of relief and joy mingled on his face as B'Elanna's statement sank in and he merely grabbed her closer and kissed her. "Thank God!" he murmured against her hair. "I was so afraid I'd lose you." B'Elanna chuckled. "I'm afraid you're stuck with me sweetheart." Tom smiled at her first use of endearment for him. He moved to the floor and knelt on one knee in front of the woman he loved. "B'Elanna, will you marry me?" She looked at the beautiful man kneeling in front of her, still half- unbelieving that he loved her enough to give up everything for her. She reached out and framed his face with her hands. "Yes I will marry you Thomas Eugene Paris." She pulled him closer and they kissed tenderly at first then passionately. They pulled apart a few minutes later, out of breath. "I think we should get out there and tell the Captain, don't you think?" Tom asked. "Okay." Tom stood up and held out his hand to her. B'Elanna took his hand and their fingers intertwined. They looked at their joined hands and knew it symbolized what their life would be together from now on, joined forever. They smiled happily at each other and stepped outside to the bridge. Tom cleared his throat. "Captain, everyone, we have an announcement to make. B'Elanna has agreed to marry me." Everybody on the bridge crowded around to congratulate them. Harry hugged Tom. "Man, I'm so happy for both of you!" He caught B'Elanna in a hug too. "Who would have thought my two best friends would get hitched?" Chakotay shook Tom's hand. "Congratulations Tom. I only ask that you take good care of her okay?" Tom smiled. "I will Chakotay. Don't worry." Tom and B'Elanna married after two months and requested that Janeway marry them onboard Voyager, a duty that Janeway was only too happy to perform. Harry was Tom's best man. Kes served as matron of honor while her husband Neelix catered the reception. Tom and B'Elanna even insisted that Neelix prepare his leola root stew. Marshmallows dotted the ambrosia fruit salad. Tuvok and his family were in attendance as well. Due to his long absence from his family, Tuvok requested an assignment that would enable him to spend more time with his family which meant that Janeway now had to find another person to be Chief Security Officer for Voyager's next mission. Libby was also a guest at the wedding and she brought along her 5 year old son who looked just like his father Harry. Libby wasn't aware that she was pregnant until after Harry started his mission with Voyager. Harry was equally surprised when after agreeing to meet in San Francisco that Libby showed up with a little boy. Libby told Harry that she never really intended to marry after Harry's parents had delivered the news that Harry died in the Badlands because she had Harry's son. They discovered they still loved each other after all these years and their wedding next month would also be officiated by Janeway. The festivities was tinged by a little sadness by the absence of former First Officer, Chakotay. But before he left, Chakotay spoke with B'Elanna privately and told her how proud he was of her. B'Elanna told him that she felt like she was betraying the Maquis by not re-joining. Chakotay reassured her that she was making the right decision and that she had a new future now with Tom and the coming child. And that they would always be friends. Chakotay also said a private farewell to Janeway where they shared one last final intimate moment together. B'Elanna was offered a position at Starfleet Academy to teach at the Engineering Department. She was unsure at first about accepting because she didn't feel qualified enough to teach at the Academy. Starfleet had her take difficult engineering courses and after passing the qualifying exams with flying colors, it was only then that B'Elanna felt self-confident enough to accept the position. Now that B'Elanna was no longer with the Maquis, Tom decided to stay with Starfleet who finally decided to reinstate his officer status which delighted his father, Admiral Owen Paris. Tom and his father found peace with each other after his father, believing his only son Tom was dead, realized that Tom's prison record was nothing compared to the idea that his son was dead. B'Elanna was so nervous about meeting Tom's distinguished father. Admiral Paris, however, saw that B'Elanna was truly in love with Tom and became genuinely fond of B'Elanna after Tom introduced them. Admiral Paris was so ecstatic at the idea of being a grandfather that he immediately outfitted a room in his house as a nursery for future visits. Janeway was awaiting word from Starfleet Command on where her next mission would be. She merely requested that Tom Paris be her Chief Helmsman, who gladly accepted, and Harry Kim also agreed to stay on as Chief Operations Officer with a promotion to Lieutenant. After their return to the Alpha Quadrant, she found out through mutual friends that Mark had married and divorced a few years after her disappearance. She had contacted him and were still taking the relationship one day at a time. She wasn't sure yet whether she could tell Mark about Chakotay but decided there should be no secrets between them. Mark said he was glad that Janeway shared that part of her life with him. They were all a little older and a lot wiser now after their sojourn into the Delta Quadrant but it had made them all into a family. Even though they were now scattered throughout the Alpha Quadrant, Janeway knew that in their hearts they would always think of themselves as the Voyager family. The End Any comments would be very welcome and appreciated! Thanks!