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If These Bottles Could Talk

by Katelyn Brown

The Characters:
Lt. Carey
Lt. Nicoletti
Ens. Samantha Wildman
Meghan Delaney
Jenny Delaney
Chell

=/\=

Chell: Iím bored.
Carey: Youíre always bored.
Chell: Iím not always bored.
Sue: Chell, youíre always bored, and you know it.
Chell: Fine, so Iím bored. Is there anything wrong with that?
Sam: Only if you have five bottles of 2335 Burgandy sitting in front of you.
Jenny: (grinning) Oh, youíre goodÖ
Sam: Yeah, I know. Iíve had these in storage since Naomi was born. Tonight, sheís with Neelix and Iím on my own.
Sue: You traded your little baby for five bottles of Burgandy?
Sam: Sheís not a baby anymore. She turned five last month.
Meghan: I know, I was there. Sheís such a big thing, isnít she?
Sam: (smiling) Yeah, she is. Sheís great. I canít believe how lucky I am to have her here with me.
Carey: I miss my kids.
Sam: Youíll see them soon. Didnít you get a transmission last month?
Carey: Yeah, but itís not the sameÖ(sighs)
Jenny: Well, at least you have kids. Iíll probably be single forever.
Sam: Aw, Harry still not giving in?
Meghan: (laughing) Not at the speed Harryís running in the opposite direction!
Jenny: Well, rumor has it that he has the hots for you.
Meghan: The gossip concerning the romantic interest of Harry Kim have been greatly exaggerated.
Jenny: Uh huhÖ
Meghan: Hey!
Sue: Ok, break it up. Letís crack open one of these before we get desperate. (Joe opens a bottle and pours six glasses and passes them around.)
Carey: Mmmmm, Sam, youíve been holding out on us.
Sam: Shhhh, donít say anything to anyone else. Weíll have a mutiny on our hands.
Chell: Ah, like we almost had with the Bajoran mind meld person whoever he was.
Carey: Oh, donít remind me. Iíve never seen so much hysteria in my life.
Jenny: Iím sure we could come up with some more exciting moments from our past that greatly surpass the Maquis being taken over by a Bajoran.
Chell: Like?
Jenny: One doesnít need to go far to go straight to the Borg.
Sam: (shudders) Donít remind me. That is one part of our history that continues to plague me.
Sue: You mean with Naomi?
Sam: With Naomi, with Neelix, with the Captain, with Seven herself. I am so sick of it.
Carey: Iíve never had much interaction with Seven. I mean, weíve worked together a couple of times on missions and things like that. But normally itís Lt. Torres who works with her.
Jenny: Well, take it from Stellar Cartography, youíre lucky.
Meghan: The woman can be a royal pain in the you-know-what most of the time.
Sam: Sometimes I wonder if the Captain made a good decision when she brought her on board.
Carey: You think the Captain was wrong?
Sam: Possibly. I mean, sure, Sevenís done a lot of good on board, butÖyeah, I donít know. (shrugs)
Jenny: No, I think I know what you mean. Captain Janewayís not perfect, you know.
Sam: I feel bad talking about her like that, though.
Sue: (laughs) You think youíre the first person who has ever questioned what the Captainís done?
Sam: Of course not.
Sue: Donít worry about it, nothing leaves this room.
Chell: Right, nothing leaves the room.
Carey: Nothing.
Jenny: Not nothing, not nobody.
Meghan: Zip, nada, ex-nay on the alking-tay.
Sam: Huh?
Meghan: (laughing) NevermindÖ

=/\=

(Second bottle is openedÖ)
Chell: I wanna go homeÖ
Carey: Me too.
Sam: Anyone here get a letter in the last transmission?
Jenny: I did.
Sue: From who?
Meghan: Our mom.
Sue: What was it about?
Meghan: Our dad died.
Sue: OhÖIím so sorry.
Jenny: Me too.
Meghan: He was old, though. Very old.
Jenny: I wanna go home.
Chell: Anyone know how much longer until we get home?
Carey: 28 years and eleven months.
Chell: Wow.
Carey: Yeah.
Sue: I suppose thatís an improvement from 75 years, though. I mean, I thought I was going to die when I heard that.
Sam: I wonder how Earth is going to be in 28 years. Weíve missed so much already. It hardly seems right for us to just come back to Earth and the Federation after everything weíve been through.
Jenny: After what weíve been through, you should say.
Sue: You think theyíll make the Maquis go to jail?
Sam: What in the world would possess you to think that?
Sue: Theyíre criminals, you know.
Chell: But damn resourceful criminals.
Sue: I didnít mean to insult youÖ
Chell: I know.
Carey: I donít think theyíll go to jail. (pauses) Nah, life in the Delta Quadrantís been punishment enough. They wonít go to jail.
Chell: I certainly hope not.

=/\=

(Third bottle is open)
Sam: So does anybody know what Lt. Paris and Lt. Torres are going to name their baby?
Carey: I work with the woman everyday and I havenít heard a thing.
Jenny: Harry hasnít mentioned anything to me, so I donít know.
Meghan: Me either.
Chell: I think theyíre naming it something human. But I donít really know.
Sue: I think a human name would be a good thing. I heard Neelix was offering Talaxian names or something bizarre like that.
Sam: Naomi is so excited about the baby coming. She keeps asking me everyday to ask Lt. Torres when the baby is coming.
Jenny: I canít imagine having a baby on a starship. I donít know how you do it, Sam.
Sam: Oh itís easy when you have friends as great as you guys.
Meghan: Awwwwwww shucks. (grins)
Chell: I wonder if any other kids will be born on Voyager. Weíve still got about thirty years to go until we reach Earth. Itíd be interesting to see what kind of generation we create on this ship.
Jenny: Can you imagine having little rugrats running around the ship? Gettiní into warp cores and shield matrices and other stuff.
Sue: Oh gee, I donít think you can get more cynical than that.
Jenny: Iím not being cynical, Iím beingÖ.
Sam: Annoying?
Jenny: Hey! (gasps) That was not nice. True, but definitely not nice.

=/\=

(Fourth bottle is opened)
Chell: Is it me or is the room starting to spin a bit?
Carey: Canít hold your liquor, Chell?
Chell: Oh, no, Iíll be fine.
Sam: You sure?
(Chell nods his head)
Jenny: Well, Iím certainly enjoying myself. Havenít had this much fun in months.
Meghan: Yeah, we really should do this more often.
Carey: Iím not sure how much longer we should be doing this. Iíve got work tomorrow morning starting at 0800 hours. My head is gonna kill me and I just know Iím gonna defuse a plasma coil or something.
Meghan: Iíll tell the Doctor to expect another broken nose. (breaks into giggles)
Carey: Oh, very funny, Meg. Thatís terrific. Go and throw salt on the wound.
Sam: My God, that was like, what, seven years ago?
Meghan: Hey, Iím sure there have been times BíElannaís wanted to pop you one again.
Carey: Not at sixth months pregnant she wonít.
Jenny: Nah, sheíd probably get Tom to beat you up.
Sue: Or Commander Chakotay. Iíve heard heís got a pretty mean left hook.
Jenny: Exactly. Commander Chakotay. He studied boxing, you know.
Carey: Yeah, rumor has it he stuck BíElanna on the ship so he could go watch the Tsunkatse game last year.
Sue: That game was weird. I never really understood the game very well. Just looked like punching, nothing special about that. But then Seven shows up and everything changed.
Jenny: I know. Weíve had some pretty incredible adventures. The Kazon, the Borg, the Hirogen. Iím gonna miss this place.
Chell: Youíre kidding right?
Jenny: No. Iím serious. So much stuff has happened here. I mean, ok, what is one adventure weíve been on that you honestly can say youíll never forget?
Sam: All of them, honestly. Ok, if I had to narrow them downÖletís see. Probably when Naomi was born. When the ship was split into two parts and my Naomi died and our Harry died. But then the other Naomi and Harry came. Changed my life. Changed the way I looked at life and how things worked in the universe.
Carey: When Hogan died. Being on that God-forsaken planet in the middle of nowhere, dumped by the Kazons. Then having one of my friends die. It was horrible. Sometimes I still donít believe it happened.
Sam: He was a good friend to all of us.
Sue: Our first real encounter with the Borg. When we were working with Seven, as Borg, and we had all those other Borg on board. It was the first time I had really seen one, up close and in person. Scared me to death.
Jenny: Yeah, that was definitely scary. But now, when we see Borg, itís almost like, no big deal. Weíll defeat them. Weíve done it before.
Meghan: Captain Proton! Oh, those were fun. I canít believe Tom ended them. I was so mad. But, we canít exactly do The Adventures of Captain Proton without Captain Proton. But I suppose all good things must come to an end.
Chell: That horrible Bajoran who tried to make all the Maquis turn against the Captain and Voyager. I canít believe that happened. It was so strange. It was like we went back and time and were re-living the good ole days.
Jenny: Do you miss being a Maquis?
Chell: Well, yes, in some ways I do. Out on our own, defending what we believed in. But now I believe in Voyagers mission and weíre still out on our own, so I guess not much has changed.
Jenny: Ok, my turn. I think the adventure Iíll remember the most isÖisÖthe first one. The Caretaker and the first time we met the Kazon. I remember I was denial about the whole thing. I didnít believe we were really 70,000 lightyears away. I didnít believe it. I couldnít. And now that weíre 30,000 lightyears away, I still canít believe it. Weíre going home.

=/\=

(fifth bottle is opened)
Carey: Last one.
Sam: Already? Wow. Time flies when youíre having fun, I guess.
Jenny: Yeah, wow. What time is it?
Chell: Oh, itís only 0100 hours.
Meghan: 0100 hours! I have to be at work in seven hours.
Carey: Me too.
Sue: Me three. We should finish this bottle up and then all head to bed.
Carey: Oh, yes, and then we look forward the monstrous hangover tomorrow, er, today, actually.
Sam: Maybe the Doctor can give us something.
Sue: I hope. Otherwise Iím not going to be functional.
Meghan: This really has been fun though.
Sue: But nothing leaves this room.
Chell: Right, nothing leaves the room.
Carey: Nothing
Jenny: Not nothing, not nobody.
Meghan:Zip, nada, ex-nay on the alking-tay.
Sam: What is that?!?
Meghan: (laughing) Ask Naomi.

The End





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