This is from the epsoide "Fate". Gary asks himself that question after failing to save Jeriamah from falling from the ladder.
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by Lori Anderson
Gary just started horrified and helpless as Jermianh's grip finally loosened
and he fell to his death below. He sat in Detective Armstrong's car numb
all over. It was like he was detached from what was going on somehow.
"The baby needed milk for her bottle," was the answer he gave as to the question
why he was in the building.
"How did you know about the defective heater?," Paul asked.
I can't tell him the truth. He'll think I'm a nut or something. "I, I smelled the gas coming from the door," Gary replied.
"So, you smelled the gas and knew that it was going to explode. What made you go back to the roof after you pullled the alarm?"
"I had a feeling that someone was up there. I found him under something and tried to get him across to safety."
Gary couldn't say anymore. The guilt he was feeling was too much for him to bear. Someone had died while he had been trying to save the man. Why didn't he hang on? After all the people I've saved, I failed this time.
Getting drunk wasn't the answer, but it would help a little, he thought. After finishing his drink, Gary got up to leave the old seedy bar and saw someone sitting in a booth with dirty hands looking at him. Naw, it couldn't be. I must be dreaming. It's the achool. Maybe I'll feel better if I go home and try to sleep. Hands in his pockets, Gary left the bar and went back to his own bar. He told Marissa and Erica he was tired and went upstairs to his loft.
Why Me? Why was I given the stupid paper for anyway? A man died because I couldn't save him. I failed. It's all that paper's fault. Had it told me he
was there in the first place, I could've gotten him down the stairs to safety. Gary just started out his window the whole night. He didn't sleep in his bed
once. As far as he was concerned, he never wanted to hear the cat again. He also never wanted to see the paper either. It's brought me nothing but pain
ever since it came. I hate it. I wish it never came.
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